Fridge Monitors

I was waiting impatiently for my hot pocket to heat up in the lunchroom microwave, when one of our resident senile employees, Herman, walks into the kitchen. I try to make small talk with her as she opens the fridge. She grabs her lunch, sets it on the microwave, and then looks in the fridge again.

“This was in here last week. It’s been in here for a whole week!”

Herman pulls out someone’s lunch. As to why she’s monitoring what’s in the fridge, I have no idea. She continues ranting about leaving food in the fridge and puts the offending food on top of the microwave. I honestly can’t believe why she’d pull out someone else’s lunch and decide it was unfit to be in the fridge when the fridge is clearly packed with lunches.

The crazy old lady then leaves the lunch room. She didn’t wash out the container with the offending lunch; she didn’t throw the lunch away. She just pulled it out of the fridge, left it on the counter, and walked away.

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Then we have Carol-the-Skeksi, of course. Bushead was in charge of cleaning out the fridge during the holiday break. Bushead sent around an email in the building for people to mark the food they wanted to keep in the fridge over the break.

Carol-the-Skeksi wasn’t having it. She confronted Bushead and said, “I’m going to have to micromanage the fridge cleanout. You have to throw everything away. Nobody is allowed to keep anything.”

Bushead was a little confused by this remark, “Oh, but if I had salad dressing or something like that in there, I’d like to keep it so I can use it again.”

Carol then goes into freak-out mode, “We are going to be gone for two weeks. Do you want people to DIE?”