The Gonzo voice
You know those people, that when you hear their voice it just makes you want to run away or throw heavy sharp objects at them? The kind of voice that makes you want to say ANYTHING just to get them out of the room and away from you?
It’s even worse when they speak down to you, like you’re a moron, oblivious to all that is around you. And it’s TWICE as bad when the ‘powers-that-be’ inflate said annoying-voice person by saying they’re the tech-guru of your office, when, in reality, they know less about technology that the average teenager’s parent.
We had our stupid & pointless-as-hell staff retreat this past week, where it was made startlingly clear that Gonzo (aka, Mr. Annoying Voice/Holier than thou) wasn’t the technology guru that he (and his superiors) made himself out to be. He was sadly and stubbornly convinced that RSS-feeds and IPod technology were one & the same.
I honestly can’t even wrap my head around how the two could be confused, but whatever. It was funny enough to post about.
Then, yesterday, Gonzo had some beef to talk to our neighbor across the hall about. Apparently she did something that wasn’t as accurately tech-savvy as it should be (something about CD-Rom burners and VHS tapes) and she was suffering a 45-minute lecture because of it.
I felt, at first, compelled to save said neighbor from her torture, then I felt compelled to throw my desk phone across the hall.
Gonzo’s voice is similar to Gonzo the Muppet AND he looks like Gonzo: bulging eyes, glasses, large nose, oddly lanky appendages… It’s only a shame that he isn’t blue and doesn’t have an uncanny love for chickens.
Anyway, his voice has an annoying tendency to move up and down the volume and octave scale. It grates on your nerves if you have to listen to him for more than 5-minutes at a time—and he usually tends to drone on and on and on, just to hear himself talk and repeat himself over and over and over. (kinda like my blog?)
Frustrated, I instant message Clark complaining about Gonzo and asking him if it was wrong to feel violent tendencies towards his presence. Clark sympathized with my feelings and said he was facing similar difficulties.
Not 5-minutes into our IM conversation and Piper jumps up from her chair, walks over to our office door, and shuts it. “I couldn’t stand listening to him any longer.” We all start laughing in agreement.
Then, mere seconds after the door was shut, Step-on-me opens it, steps into the room, and shuts the door behind her. “Did you guys just shut your door because of Gonzo?” We nod. She replies, “Oh my god! I can’t stand his VOICE. It’s driving me nuts. I can’t think!! I’m going to shut my door, too.” We laugh again and she leaves.
I really hope Gonzo heard us talking about him. I know that’s kind of mean, but he’s so obnoxious. I can’t think of anything else aside from getting him far-far away from my personal space when he’s around. If I was being tortured, listening to Gonzo lecture me would be one of the top things that would get me to crack within 10-minutes—especially if I was forced to pay attention and watch him.
I need a new job. This place is driving me insane.
It’s even worse when they speak down to you, like you’re a moron, oblivious to all that is around you. And it’s TWICE as bad when the ‘powers-that-be’ inflate said annoying-voice person by saying they’re the tech-guru of your office, when, in reality, they know less about technology that the average teenager’s parent.
We had our stupid & pointless-as-hell staff retreat this past week, where it was made startlingly clear that Gonzo (aka, Mr. Annoying Voice/Holier than thou) wasn’t the technology guru that he (and his superiors) made himself out to be. He was sadly and stubbornly convinced that RSS-feeds and IPod technology were one & the same.
I honestly can’t even wrap my head around how the two could be confused, but whatever. It was funny enough to post about.
Then, yesterday, Gonzo had some beef to talk to our neighbor across the hall about. Apparently she did something that wasn’t as accurately tech-savvy as it should be (something about CD-Rom burners and VHS tapes) and she was suffering a 45-minute lecture because of it.
I felt, at first, compelled to save said neighbor from her torture, then I felt compelled to throw my desk phone across the hall.
Gonzo’s voice is similar to Gonzo the Muppet AND he looks like Gonzo: bulging eyes, glasses, large nose, oddly lanky appendages… It’s only a shame that he isn’t blue and doesn’t have an uncanny love for chickens.
Anyway, his voice has an annoying tendency to move up and down the volume and octave scale. It grates on your nerves if you have to listen to him for more than 5-minutes at a time—and he usually tends to drone on and on and on, just to hear himself talk and repeat himself over and over and over. (kinda like my blog?)
Frustrated, I instant message Clark complaining about Gonzo and asking him if it was wrong to feel violent tendencies towards his presence. Clark sympathized with my feelings and said he was facing similar difficulties.
Not 5-minutes into our IM conversation and Piper jumps up from her chair, walks over to our office door, and shuts it. “I couldn’t stand listening to him any longer.” We all start laughing in agreement.
Then, mere seconds after the door was shut, Step-on-me opens it, steps into the room, and shuts the door behind her. “Did you guys just shut your door because of Gonzo?” We nod. She replies, “Oh my god! I can’t stand his VOICE. It’s driving me nuts. I can’t think!! I’m going to shut my door, too.” We laugh again and she leaves.
I really hope Gonzo heard us talking about him. I know that’s kind of mean, but he’s so obnoxious. I can’t think of anything else aside from getting him far-far away from my personal space when he’s around. If I was being tortured, listening to Gonzo lecture me would be one of the top things that would get me to crack within 10-minutes—especially if I was forced to pay attention and watch him.
I need a new job. This place is driving me insane.
posted by Laura Mitter at
9:57 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home